Did I mention that 2010 is the Year of Crap?

My grandmother died on Wednesday. The funeral is Monday.

The weird thing is (and for those of you who don't have an active belief in any sort of afterlife, this will seem really weird) I think she's okay now. I mean, there she was, in Kroger's (grocery store here in Cincy, OH), and then she was hit by a sudden pain, a WTF moment, then boom, she's standing outside her body going, "Huh..." in a Mal Reynolds-type fashion. No more bills to pay (and we didn't know until my Dad and Aunt started going through her paperwork trying to sort things out on Wednesday afternoon that she'd taken out a loan that she was trying to repay and had several credit card bills they didn't know about, not to mention that she'd had to cancel part of her life insurance because she couldn't afford it anymore) and no more worry over...anything else.

I think my Grandpa was there to meet her. He was so handsome when he was young. I've seen their wedding picture, and seriously... he was movie-star handsome. I think he was young and sober and waiting for her. At least I hope so. And her sister, my Great Aunt Marleen who everyone called Bubbles was there, too. She died when I was in 5th grade. And my Aunt Debbie who died of lukemia when she was only 13...my dad was 9. I'm sure she was there. And my Great-Grandma. She'd be waiting too. So it's just us left behind that are unhappy and dealing with this. (My aunt and my cousin Stephen are taking this the hardest. My grandma lived with them since my grandpa died almost 10 years ago, and even before that, she practically helped my aunt raise Stephen when his dad left.)

Anyway, I think she's okay. I think she can relax now and be happy. Until next time around. Hopefully she takes a nice long break between incarnations, though. I don't think she was very happy in this one. She needs a little R&R before heading back into the fray.

2010 already seems to be the Year of Poo, not just in the world, but personally. I've had family members in and out of the hospital in the last 3 weeks, though thankfully nothing serious. I discovered I have bedbugs, and let me tell you how icky and loathsome this exeriance is turning out to be. EW! Plus Haiti and surely a bunch of other things I'm frankly too insular to know about.

*sigh*

I'm beginning to think 2012 might actually be the end of the world as we know it. Come let's all break into REM, shall we?

It's the end of the world as we know it
(It's the end)
It's the end of the world as we know it
(It's the end)
And I feel fine!

I want you to know, that as of tonights episode of Dollhouse...

I AM IN LOVE WITH TOPHER BRINK!!!

I have ganked 3 Whedon-inspired fan-mixes from curi_o . You can find them, and some more lovely mixes she made, here: http://curi-o.livejournal.com/50693.html

I LOVE YOU!!!!!

Okay, so I've been a huge lazy-ass lately! LOL! I know, I know, I'm sorries! I haven't posted in forever, but I just feel like...belgh! What's been going on in my life that's so exciting? You know? I get up, I go to work, (I think I'm getting carpal in my wrist, elbow, and shoulder--or tendinitis, whatever, cuz they alternately hurt and feel tingly numb. We don't have arm rests on our chairs, and our desks are situated funny so my right arm--dominant hand, and all--is constantly hanging off my shoulder very unhealthfully and...ow.), I then come home, occasionally watch some boob-tube, read, read on ff.net, and go to beddies just so I can get up and do it again. I don't DO anything. I have no car, and the Cincy metro is kinda the suck in terms of routes and destinations. Plus...I IS ALL ALOOOOONE!!!! My peeps have all left me and gotten real lives. (Not that I blame y'alls. I just...am lonely. I don't make friends easily, not real ones, and don't get me wrong, I like my solitude, but I miss you guys who used to be here.

Which is a nice segue into this little bit of me-ness: I'm thinking of joining Geek2Geek, that internet dating, chat place for, well, geeks, obviuosly. I mean, where else am I going to find someone who gets the reference "If you can't run, you crawl, and if you can't do that, you find someone to carry you"? Or who knows how to read manga correctly, and understands Buffy references, and won't think I'm a total freak if I squee about fanfiction and icons and wallpapers featuring my ship-of-the-year? And, even better, someone who won't think it's weird when I crack out my tarot cards and do a quick celtic cross or when I HAVE to stop in the bookstore before I leave the mall and spend an hour and a half ogling the pretties.

See, the problem with me, I'll admit, is that I'm a hypocrite. Let me explain: I'm rather chubby. I'd call myself fat, though there are definitely those who are larger than me. I'm also not particularly pretty. I clean up okay, and I'm even...cute, I guess, when I put my mind to it. But my face is kind of squished together (true-- I had someone at Lenscrafters a few years ago helping me pick out new frames and she mentioned that my facial features were all centered very close together) and plus with the extra poundage, I'm not classically pretty. It's not low self-esteem, it's owning a mirror and knowing what I look like. But...I like hot guys. I'd like someone who's interested in me to be thinnish and handsome. Well kept, well groomed, and yummy. And those guys??? Are never going to look twice at me. I know this.  It's an evolutionary perogative--good-looking people end up with good-looking people, the smart to the smart, the wealthy with the wealthy...like attacts like in all things except physics. But when some...troll gives me what he clearly thinks is a charming smirk (usually just creepy) and says (INVARIABLY! EVERY FRIGGIN' TIME!!!) "Hey, baby, what's yo' name?" (Uh, Not Interested.) all I can think is, why do cute guys never flirt with me.

See? Hypocrite.

Also, snob. I know. It's a failing, but I'm not sure it's one I'm willing to give up. I mean, is it snobbery or standards? Probably a bit of both.

Okay, I've burdened you all with my pathos enough for one post. As always, I'll try to update more often. LOVE YOU ALL!
CWC

Took me all bloody week to post this, but YAY! I took my sister to see Mama Mia! (stage show) on Saturday last. It was so fun. We got all dolled up and went downtown to catch an afternoon matinee, then caught the bus back to my humble abode. We went to the College Hill Coffee Company for dinner, then watched Dodgeball. (Then, unfortunately, I had the mother of all sinus headaches thanks to the bloody soggy weather we had that day) so I had to go to bed. She slept over on the floor. And scared the crap out of me in the middle of the night when she got up to go to the bathroom. Sheesh!  'Bout gave her sissy a heart attack!

The show was awesome! I'd seen the movie before, and it follows the stage version very closely. There were a few differences, obviously, but it was truly adorable. The curtain call took forever, but it was fun. Everybody in the theater was up and dancing at the end. It was a lot of fun! I think Kate had a lot of fun, but she's not very communicative. But she said she had fun. And so did I. :D

totally stole from Toxic Corn!

1. WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother & father's middle name): Christina James
2. NASCAR NAME: (first name of your mother's dad & father's dad): Al Robert
3. STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name): Blaca
4. DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal): Burgundy Dragon (shut up! It is a real animal!)
5. SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born): Elizabeth Clifton (It's part of Cincy! And it sounds better)
6. SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd fav color, fav drink, add "THE" to the beginning): The Green Mojito (...*!snort!*)
7. FLY NAME: (first 2 letters of 1st name, last 2 letters of your last name): Cack (to quote Toxinc "...the fuck?")
8. GANGSTA NAME: (fav ice cream flavor, fav cookie): Mint Chip Sandies (it frightens me that that sounds almost possible)
9. ROCK STAR NAME: (current pets name, current street name): Cloe Hamilton (had to use sister's pet, but still, cool!)
10. STRIPPER NAME: (name of your fav perfume/cologne, fav candy): Sweet Honesty Twizzlers (homydeargods!!!!!)

Nothing is ever free. Remember that.

I'm sure you guys have seen the banners and web ads for the Rachel Ray, "as seen on CNN", Acai Berry diet coupled with the colonic supplements. It's the one with the fresh-faced blonde with glasses. Out of curiosity and no little amount of annoyance when yet another pair of jeans didn't quite button, I clicked on the ad, read the real life shpeal of the perky blonde, and decided--hell, it's a free trial. It if doesn't work, I'm out a couple bucks shipping and handling, and what's that compared to a pair of cute jeans I bought in August not fitting me in February? It's not like I was expecting miracles. I'm on the dumpy side of curvey, and my goal weight is 140; in my wildest dreams I'm a size 8, but I was pretty much hoping for a size 10 or even a consistant size 12 would be better than jumping between 14 and 16. So, I get the free trials of both.

Now, here's what they don't tell you. You're not just signing up for the free trail, you're signing up for membership, and when you give them your credit card number, they retain it in their system. This week I was contacted by my credit union, where I get my debit/credit card through, with two charges of over $75 dollars each to Acai Berry and Colon Medic. I had no idea where they came from, as I'm not done with my free trail yet, and I certainly did not order more of either. They just sent me stuff and billed me. Surprise!

So, life lesson learned. I've canceled both accounts and am trying to get a refund, but not holding my breath. For anyone who might be tempted to be as gullible as I was---DON'T FALL FOR FREE TRIALS!!!

I am now, officially, in my new apartment!!!!!

I've been here a week today. The move was tiring, of course, and I think my Dad was about to disown me at one point, LOL! But most of my stuff is put a way, and I have things mostly where I want them. I still need at least one more lamp for my living room since there's no over-head light in that room, and I need a table in my dining room. Yeah, that room is pretty much bare at this point.... But my kitchen is all in order, and so is my bathroom. I'm getting used to all the noises and quirks of the place, and I'm sleeping more-or-less through the night. The only thing that seems to be consistantly waking me up is temperature change. I'm on radiator heat, so when the water is on, it gets warm fast. When it's off, it gets chilly. So during the night, the heat will turn on and I'll get hot and kick off my blankets, then when it turns off, I get cold and wake up to pull them back on. But that's not so horrible. There's no air conditioning (the building is at least 80 years old) so we'll see how I do in the summer, huh?

I'm so ridiculously happy, though! Being on my own has, so far, been good for me. Relaxing, and quiet and freeing.

To everyone who celebrates anything in the month of December, Happy Winter Holiday! I hope everyone had a peaceful day/week/fortnight of their choice. And, if you get presents, then I hope you got what you wanted.

It was a good Christmas Eve for me, which, in my family, is when the true festivities are held. Two of my cousins are pregnant, so it was a night of pregnacy stories, baby names, and general squealing. (A little bittersweet for me.) Plus, there were lots of cookies (I am such a cow!) and fudge and, of course, the inevitable family stories. Now that's always fun, although a bit of a broken record. Still, very funny. I feel sorry for the new additions to the family (the in-flux of in-laws we've gotten the last year and a half) who have to get used to the combined Lenzer-Knapke brand of insanity. We're pretty odd.

How was your holiday?